Jane’s Story

by | Jul 22, 2025 | Articles/News | 2,371 comments

Over the years, countless people have come into our Simply Grace office seeking advice. Recently, we had a client (female, late 20’s) come into our office doing just that. She was overwhelmed, and experiencing high anxiety over making important decisions. Her initial goal was to deal with the anxiety, periods of depression and learn how to make better decisions; starting with the one in front of her. In her opinion, a past track record of decision making was extremely poor.

Jane did not fully realize but she was in an internal “tug of war”. A war with blurred boundaries, covert operations and undeclared objectives; her battle (like yours and mine) cannot always be overcome by conventional means.

 

The weapons of our warfare are not physical [weapons of flesh and blood]. Our weapons are divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses. 2 Corinthians. 10:4, AMP

 

Prior to our awakening to Christ, there is but one dominate kingdom fully active in our life. After our awakening, another foreign kingdom establishes a beachhead on the shores of our soul; and so, the “tug of war” begins… As Jane reveals segments of her story, we begin to see her internal strongholds or fortresses. These strongholds, originally meant to protect her from hurt and rejection have turned on her. She has become a prisoner, walled in with fear, guilt, and shame; however, there is a new Kingdom on the shore of her soul.

 

She opened up by telling some of her story:

“After High School, I floundered for several years, moved in with friends, found an okay job; yet, my relationships were toxic. For the last several years I’ve felt abandoned by my family, especially my mom. She used to call and check on me, but lately we’ve drifted apart. In the last two years, I have made some positive changes in my life. I have enrolled at a local university, started back to church and had an amazing encounter with Christ. For the first time in my life, I feel connected, respected and loved; however, I have some very low depressive days that have turned into weeks. Then, somehow I reboot, regain energy and accomplish a lot, but I have so much time to make up for; I am so far behind. I’ve wasted years of my life. I feel like I have to prove myself over and over but it never seems like enough.”

 

Rather than giving direct advice, as a counselor one would want to create a safe, supportive environment; suspending judgement as much as possible. This sets the stage for exploratory sessions for the client. Allowing freedom exploring their own thoughts, and feelings tapping deep into their core issues as well as values. This is where self-discovery and empowerment are encouraged and Christ’s loving transformation received.

 

After several sessions exploring her history (story) we discovered that much of her belief system programming was very negative. Our old programming is mostly responsible for the creation of our false self and fleshly coping mechanisms.

 

Below is a summary chart of her belief system and concept of God.

Mis-Belief (Lie) Feelings Behavior(s)

I am a burden to mom Guilt, shame Try hard, give up PBA

I am a failure, stupid Inadequate, hopeless Try hard, give up, self-pity PBA

I am selfish Guilt, shame Escape (unhealthy ways)

I am a whiner Unheard, invalid, trapped Self-pity, withdrawal

I can’t be trusted Helpless, hopeless, indecisive Procrastination

I am not worth it (worthless) Helpless, hopeless Self-pity, escape, people pleaser

Self-hatred Anger, resentment, bitterness Self-pity, sabotage

Note: PBA stands for Performance Based Acceptance

 

 

Jane’s Story, continued… Simply Grace Now

 

Concept of God Feelings Source of Concept

God is distant Confusion, insecurity Dad absent, emotional disconnection

God does not care about me Frustration, confusion, self-pity Mom does not care about me

As children, we create a concept of God from several sources, i.e., parents, Bible, authority, etc. Above has to do with her (our) experiential concept of God.

 

Her Story, continued…

What was your life like at ages 15-18?

“At 15, life had gotten extreme. As I look back, that period of time was very dark; my grades were below average, and I seemed to be in trouble all the time. My relationship with my Mom was rocky at best; she was so frustrated with me. All I got from her was advice and more advice. I was failing in life. My sister on the other hand, was on top of the world. Her grades, athletic awards, friends and scholarship offers were proof, that she was nailing it. I made it through high school, barely. As I look back, I was sabotaging myself. I truly believed I was a failure.”

 

How was your relationship with your family and God around age 10?

“I had one older sister (2 years older). She was so smart, had straight A’s, athletic, determined, always right, the favorite, lots of friends, well liked and always steady with God.

When I would see my mother with my sister, mom seemed relaxed, happy and proud. With me, mom seemed very determined, intentional, concerned or worried; always pushing me to excel and offering lots of advice. I felt inadequate, less than and hopeless at times.

Dad was always covered up with work; so he wasn’t around much. When he was, he was always tired, distant.

God seemed mostly distant in my life at that time too.”

 

Any significant things happen around that age?

“Yes, from fourth to sixth grade I was tutored in math and science by my older sister per Mom’s directive. She knew the material well; but, did not want to do it. She was made to do it by Mom. As a result, she would trick me and shame me for not knowing the answers. I would tell Mom about it, she would confront her and then my sister would deny it. My self-worth went down the tubes. Around that time is when I began to feel completely worthless, and stupid. I hated me. I feel like self-hatred plagues me even today.”

 

A man’s mind plans his way [as he journeys through life], But the LORD directs his steps and establishes them.

Proverbs 16:9 AMP

 

An application of the above verse: We, as counselors, surrender to God’s unique plan(s) for this person in this specific season in their life. We have ideas from past counseling experience(s) where this process may lead them; however, we remain open to God in His unique dealing(s) with the client. These unique endeavors shape the counselor as well as the client. God is so loving and powerful. He is able to work with/on many of us as He works on the one (the client).

Note: A longer version of this newsletter will soon be available on our website under the articles section.

A further note: Jane is a fictitious name used for explaining and exploring our process(s) of counseling and emotional healing.

 

In the next edition(s) of Simply Grace Now, we will:

-See Jane’s blurred boundaries in a different light or perspective.

-Clarify these covert operations that have created so much resistance in her life.

-Declare some healthy objectives, intentions and operations in order for her to heal and move forward.

 

Over the past 18 months, we have seen a significant drop in our Simply Grace donations. Will you ask God about helping us with a one-time donation as we continue to help those God puts in our path? Blessings, Ken & Debbie

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